hi

Its just me. Feeling my usual melancholy self. When did I get to be such a moody mcmooderson? Maybe I have always been, but was just blissfully unaware? Hard to say. Today was a really weird day. Weather wise, it was not hot but was unbearably humid. A very strange combination. Work wise, well....I worked almost 12 hours today. Shwew! And for some reason I could not sleep last night. It was one of those weird nights when you are definitely not sleeping, but are not exactly awake. I would lay there in that state, and check the clock, and it was 15 minutes. Then I would do all my little tricks to try to fall asleep, check the clock again, and whaddya know? 15 minutes had passed. I hope I fall asleep quickly tonight and stay that way. The kids start summer school tomorrow. And....I am completely neutral about that. I think my funk is that I was not ready to go back to work. I NEED MORE TIME! There just isn't enough time for all that I need/should/want to do. Not nearly enough. I made some good memories with the kids. I am thankful for that. But I was in a constant war between "Hurry up and get stuff done...you don't have much time!" and "Don't do anything! Relax! You don't have much time!" Sometimes the voice in my head is REALLY annoying.

Don't make any phone calls to psychiatrists or state hospitals. I am okay. This is my therapy. You don't have to read it if it freaks you out. ; )

Tonja